Apparently I’m going to always remember that Best Western in Bar Harbor, Maine, where I found out I was pregnant at the end of a long day of whale-watching, sightseeing, and dinner on the water. I knew I could start testing during our vacation, and for some reason, I felt pulled to pack the tests rather than simply to wait until we got home a few days later. I ended up taking a test the day before I was “supposed to” (patience is not my specialty), and it blinked positive in what felt like a nanosecond. With my very brief first pregnancy back in March (more on that another day), all the tests I took seemed to take forever to make up their minds, and the non-digital ones showed the faintest of second pink lines, and all that suddenly made sense after seeing this one. I remember flinging (literally) the test in Kevin’s direction, and we spent the last few days of our trip absorbing the news, cautiously optimistic before I could get in to see the OB the following week.
The past 3-ish months have been an interesting confluence of nerves, excitement, and nausea. Before I forget all the specific weirdness as pregnancy brain sets in, I wanted to share an update on what the first trimester was like for me (spoiler: not great!).
I started to feel sick almost immediately after we got home and after I saw the doctor to confirm everything; whether it was mental or it just hit me quickly, I don’t know. I bought the morning sickness trifecta of Preggie Pop Drops, Quease Ease, and Sea Bands – all of which worked to a degree – but I was absolutely miserable until I started taking Diclegis. It’s like, the only morning sickness medication out there, and I can’t sing its praises enough. It literally jolted me back to life, took my morning sickness away almost completely (also, the term morning sickness is not accurate, at all), and most importantly, gave me a burst of energy that had been missing for the previous few weeks. After napping in my car during lunch at work on more than one occasion, it was a welcomed change.
I say all this not to complain but to help myself remember, because now, at going on 18 weeks, I feel like a new person, and it’s easy to forget what that time was like. Even though it wasn’t fun, I feel lucky to be pregnant and am glad I can shift my attention to more fun things now that I’ve turned the second trimester corner.
I’ve been very happy with my experience at my OB, the same office I visited for all things lady-related prior to getting pregnant. They have a team of two doctors and two midwives, and you see everyone at some point in the office so you’ve met them all because anyone could be on call when the moment arrives. I had my first ultrasound at almost eight weeks, and the next one is scheduled for 20 weeks – the anatomy scan. It was surreal and also a big relief to see the baby that first time, especially after a miscarriage. I still, now, have a hard time believing it’s really in there, even as I’m getting bigger. But seeing the heartbeat flicker and learning everything was okay was a big milestone. We’ve gotten to listen to the heartbeat two additional times using the Doppler, which is also crazy – it’s so fast! I can’t wait to see it again – it will be so much bigger this time! By then we’ll be halfway there.
Fitness and Nutrition
This has been tough for me, in large part because of how crappy I felt at the beginning. I didn’t want to eat anything but bagels, frozen burritos, and McDonald’s, and keeping up my running routine was virtually out of the question (though I did run two 5k’s, somehow). I’ve gained 15 pounds so far in 17 weeks, which is more than recommended for this point, but now that I’m feeling better I’m trying to focus on eating healthier foods – back to smoothies in the morning, salads for lunch, and something good for me at dinner – and getting back in an exercise routine, even if it’s just walking or using the elliptical for a half hour every day. I haven’t had any cravings to this point (unless you count the McDonald’s, which I think was more just a desire for carbs and comfort food) – it was mainly just aversions in the first trimester. Several of our weekly Blue Apron meals made me sick to think about, and I couldn’t drink hot coffee, which normally flows through my veins. But no specific cravings to speak of.
This is the one (and only?) area that has gotten worse with time. In the beginning I was so tired that I basically fell asleep immediately each night, and could get a pretty restful night’s sleep, but lately I’ve been waking up at least 3-4 times a night to pee, and then I can’t get back to sleep. I bought a Snoogle, which I haven’t started using yet – for now I’m sleeping on my side with a regular pillow next to me. I don’t know what I’m waiting for other than to get a little bigger, I guess. But sleep is definitely worse now than it was in the first trimester.
In general, I’ve been lucky to have had a pretty positive experience to this point. Aside from not feeling great for the first several weeks, I’ve enjoyed everything that goes along with this, and I’m looking forward to all that’s left. My mood has been pretty steady, no crazy mood swings except two meltdowns: 1) When my fried egg sandwich at the diner came out not cooked all the way through and Kevin and I agreed I shouldn’t eat it, and I sobbed, and 2) When I dropped my bottle of non-alcoholic wine in the driveway and it shattered, and I sobbed even harder. (More on the non-alcoholic wine later – I AM IN LOVE AND I WANT THE COMPANY TO HIRE ME BECAUSE I AM BASICALLY ALREADY AN EVANGELIST.) I have one weird superstition to confess, which seems so odd to me because I’m not normally superstitious, and that is that I still have two tampons in my purse that I cannot for the life of me make myself take out. It just seems like taking them out is bad luck, admitting I don’t need them and that this is really happening, like I’d jinx it. It’s so, so weird. I think about it every day. And yet, there they sit. I haven’t felt the baby move yet, at least nothing that I’m sure about, but I’m confident that will happen soon. I had fun buying maternity clothes with my mom – they make them really cute these days and I’m enjoying the excuse to wear leggings and big shirts almost every day. It’s possible I will keep wearing maternity clothes always, because they’re wonderful. The biggest thing on my mind at this point is what the future holds in terms of my job – I love what I do and I never imagined myself as a stay-at-home-mom, but some days the thought of leaving my kid at daycare makes me sad and panicked, so… I am hopeful we can work out some sort of in-between situation that I don’t think I’ve dreamed up yet. Just trying to plan anything (Lord knows I am a planner) has given me to-do list on to-do list, from finances to the nursery to imagining how I’ll juggle it all and what life will be like 5 months from now. It’s a lot but it’s awesome.
I love this time of year anyway, so here’s to a fun fall and holiday season, and continuing to count down to #BabyCopp!